Q 54

What do you wanna hear when a woman is not interested in you, your friendship, your conversation, your interest in her etc?

I'm not a sillybutt and understand there won't be one magical "this answer suits all men" kinda thing I can resort to butttt as a general rule of thumb what's a polite yet firm way to say "No, thank you!"? Aaand what if "just being honest" isn't exactly an option because the reason of rejection is something potentially hurtful to the other person or simply no interest for any particular reason in them whatsoever?

Also, I don't mean the "I just gave her my number it's really whatever" kind of situation but where you put yourself out there (to some extent) and made some sort of an effort and it's now up to her to respond to it.

Oooh aaand extra points if you include a negative example of "under no circumstances do this or say that!" (:


Be very straight forward. If you think the truthful reason would be too hurtful, just go with something simple and direct: "Sorry, but I’m not interested. Please, respect me and do not pursue this any further." You can maybe add: "If you do, I’ll just push you away, and maybe in a hurtful way."

In that way, you’re not letting any doors open, it’s quick, and you’re not saying anything hurtful. It’s important to respect the other, but also to respect yourself. If you leave any doors open, you’re asking for a mess.

Never say something like: "It’s not you, it’s me" or "You’re better off without me" or "I’m doing this for you" or "It’s for the best" or anything that would deflect the issue, because then he’ll just think there’s a way, but that you’re just not being honest with him.

Also, never say something like: "You’re a good person" or "You’re a nice guy" or "You would be a great boyfriend", or anything that would make him sound like he’s too good for you, that would just hurt him more and not make any sense to be rejected. It would just sound like a lie.